Saturday, August 29, 2009

I Got A Question: Why They Hatin' On Me?

I ain't did nothing to 'em, but count this money.

And I'm sorry I had to quote Soulja Boy. But seriously. My neighbors are douchebags. And all we ever did was live near them
And we didn't call the cops when their middle son would get off his meds and rampage around the neighborhood like a tubby 12-year-old Aryan Edward Scissorhands.

And when their oldest son had to move back home because he lost his license after too many DUIs? We turned the other cheek.

And yet, every year they call The City on us for one thing or another. This is actually the second time this year as they called in the winter after Molly (The Black Lab of Doom) brought a bunch of pop cans and bottles into the backyard...and then the snow melted.

Welcome to my neighborhood.
Whatever, asshats.

So yeah, my mom, Corey and I spent Saturday afternoon with a chainsaw and a ladder dismembering the trees in our backyard so that nary a twig hung into Their Yard.

And I got sawdust in my underwear.

Not cool.

Plus, a piece of the audio jack on my radio transmitter for my iPod broke inside the iPod's audio port on Tuesday evening. And I have been lamenting about it all week on Twitter and Facebook, and OH it is sad.

And like, seriously, there had been NOTHING on the radio since I haven't been able to use it.

The most frustrating thing about it, is that it works perfectly except for the not-being-able-to-plug-anything-into-it thing.

And someone (not naming any names, Eric) got Superglue in it (long story) and I do not have the tools, the knowledge, nor the logical sense to get the piece out.

Except now, My Dad the Electrical Engineer has it and is going to fix it (since he already got a piece of it out last night and is working on trying to open the casing with a guitar pick) and soon enough I will once again be in my car blasting my iPod on shuffle mode belting out George Michael's "I Want Your Sex" while running out to grab a Slurpee.

Sex is natural, sex is good
Not everybody does it
But everybody shouuuuuuuuuuuld

I'm so excited.



  1. Well, my neighbor yelled at my son and his friends for dismembering a chair they garbage picked, telling them "this is Sterling Heights and not Detroit." with complaints about metal pieces all over the road. She actually made an attempt in her drunken stupor to sweep the road from any metallic objects. I looked around today to notice nothing metal was on the ground, and she must be seeing things. Anyway, I think the next time she complains, I will have to report the grafetti on the back of her garage, and the tall weeds next to my fence line. mayber that would shut her up.

  2. Yeah, when my mom was cutting branches, one fell on the fence so she went to Home Depot and got a replacement part and sprayed it to match and nobody can even tell which part had been broken. And yet, Neighbor Lady came out screaming about it looking ghetto.